The Promised Land

Over five thousand years ago Moses said to the children of Israel "pick
up your shovel, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the
Promised Land."

Nearly 50 years ago, Harold Wilson said, "Lay down your shovels, sit on
your asses, and light up a camel, this is the Promised Land."

Then Gordon Brown stole your shovel, taxed your asses, raised the price
of camels, and mortgaged the Promised Land.

Now David Cameron has loaned my shovel to a third World country, (he
hasn't realised yet that WE are now a third World country), raised my
fuel bills, lent my money to a crowd of incompetent, greedy "merchant
bankers" and increased VATto 20%.

I got so depressed last night I called the Samaritans, they diverted my
call to a call centre in Pakistan . I told them I was suicidal, they got
all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.